How far would you go?

Susan Finkelstein of Philadelphia, PA is a super fan of the Phillies.  Such a super fan, that she decided it would be a grand idea to solicit sex for World Series tickets, on Craigslist,  so that she could catch her beloved Phillies losing playing live against the evil empire that is the New York Yankees.

“I’m the creative type! Maybe we can help each other,” her ad read.

She was busted when an undercover police officer responded to the ad wherein she offered to perform lewd acts on the officer in exchange for the tickets.  I’d like to see the Philadelphia Phillies organization give her tickets for being so obscenely fanatic.

The I reaaaaally hope this is in fact a joke edition

In case you are unable to read this, here’s what it says. (more…)

Hilarity For Sale

First up:

What the crap is going on at U of M?

Angell Hall Bathroom Shitter - w4w

Dear Mystery Shitter:

I know. I know. It’s downright the worst bathroom on campus. The Michigan Daily even said so in an article once. It’s usually a swamp of blood, piss, shit, vomit, and several mystery substances. It’s got some interesting graffiti, but that’s about the only perk. I very rarely use it, as there’s a much nicer one down the hall. In fact, I shouldn’t even be using it at all– I graduated this spring. However, the internet is out at home, and I’ve been spending lots of time in the Fishbowl as a result. Sure, I could walk down to the nice bathroom, but the Hellhole (that is what I will call it from now on) is closer. Sue me for not wanting to walk for fifteen more seconds. I’m a massive lazy-ass. (Although I always take the stairs, even to the fifth floor in Dennison, so perhaps I’m entitled to a break.)

Regardless. With it being summer semester and all, the bathrooms are usually much cleaner. Even in the Hellhole, the majority of stalls are usable.

Not today. (more…)

The Camo Edition

My hilariously snarky neighbor, who recently started a job in Cajun Country, sent this around last night, with the admonition that he fully expected us to all fight over the sheer awesomeness of this chair:

Real Tree Camo and leather newly upholstered one of a kind chair. This is not “camp furniture”, it is a heavy and solid piece of furniture. Would be a perfect accent piece to any Den, Study or Man Cave! It is a low back, wide arm chair with a reversible cushion that can go all camo or in it’s sleek latte colored leather side, for a not so “wilderness” look. If you have any questions or would like more pictures or information on it please feel free to contact me.

Of course this had to be immediately circulated amongst the hags for feedback.  Here are some of the highlights:

Stopthemadness: “That chair would be perfect for huntin’ in the bayou!”

Lily the Pink: “What chair?  I can’t see a chair!”

Mae: “That is the classiest and finest piece of craftsmanship this side of a pull-n-pork sofa.”

Moments later, Mae again: “I can already picture that chair in the back of a ‘92 F-150 hunting nutria.”

The Amuse Bouche Edition

Here’s a little warm up for your weekend as we prepare for consuming wine bladders.

We here at Thundersquee don’t just set standards and blaze trails - we like to laugh at standards and stumble on trails. Earlier this week while I was laughing at standards and searching for a slightly used treadmill, I stumbled upon some hilariousness. You have to love Craig and his list and there are many ads that totes my goats. And so for the pleasure of your eyeballs I bring you some of the finest ads Craigslist has to offer. (more…)

The Most Important Information Available To You

Sar's real grandmother is actually this cool, minus the cuss.

Skimming Rainbow Presents: Things My Grandma Told Me

According to the internet this week…

• Children are smarter than you might give them credit for. They are a bunch of racist bastards.
• Motherhood is the ultimate sacrifice.  The last thing you need on top of it is some rugrat hogging your birthday spotlight.
• It could always be worse. You could be named Titswillow.
• Skin color does not matter. Oh except in your case, Beyonce. You’ll never get it right.
• Don’t mess with Texas. Oh wait, that wasn’t grandma. That was an ad campaign.
• Love doesn’t care who you are. It might care about your permanent record though.

…What did your grandmother tell you, Squeeple?

Oh Just Take My Word For It Already, You Were Going To Anyway.

No, Skimming Rainbow is not the latest thrill available on the Craigslist casual encounters board. (Except if you like doing it in the bookstore.)  It’s just what I’m calling this roundup of links from the week. Now that Reading Rainbow is off the air, this is the most important literature available to you.

Making it work, Weekend-At-Bernie's style.

According to the rest of the internet this week:

• Project Runway sucked this week.
• Woody Harrelson (stop yawning and read) smokes pot and justifies his drug use with our drug use. JNLYBJJ. (Judge not lest ye be Judge Judy, © stopthemadness)
• Spencer Pratt committed the unpardonable doosh. So doom! (Just in case he wasn’t already going to hell for this comment.)
• Gerard Butler refuses to make any films he’ll be remembered for.
• The Real Housewives of New Jersey’s Danielle Staub is selling her house in glamorous Wayne, NJ: Home of the Chinese restaurant where I used to get drunk.
• Am I the only one who didn’t realize Janet and Jermaine had broken up?
• An X-Factor reject got plastic surgery after being criticized once by Simon Cowell, which begs the question, why exactly did she think she was ready to be famous?

P.S. Happy Labor Day!

My kingdom for some peanut butter

I mean, it sounds like a good deal, right?

This is a “Living World” plastic aquarium with a temperature guage and humidity guage. The plastic is tinted green and the item is in very good condtion. It has a hinged top with clip lock, and air holes in the lid. It could hold water, NO CRACKS.

I will trade for a sealed jar of peanut butter or $10.

Thanks to Matt N. for the tip.  If you find something odd on Craigslist, feel free to send us a link.

Will work for opportunity to kill things

I love the helpful inclusion of the deer photo just in case you don’t know what they are.

Thanks to Matt N. for the tip.  If you find something odd on Craigslist, feel free to send us a link.