Archive for the ‘First Annual Doosh Thunderdome!’ Category
Serena Williams, Delonte West or Terrelle Pryor?
Doosh Thunderdome: It’s votin’ time.
So, whaddya reckon?
views: 205
Thundersquee’s 2009 Doosh Thunderdome!
Terrelle Pryor: Doosh Dossier 
This year has visited a groundswell of doosh upon the hapless heads of Hags and Squeeple alike. A torrential outpouring of vinegar so vast in scope and relentless in attack that it can relate to only this: the countless acts of dooshery, douchestacity, and douchebagelry with which we, in the People’s Republic of Thundersquee!, have been forced to reckon. It ain’t pretty people. We’ve had Kanye Interruptus; Carrie Preach-jean; Jon “Ed Hardy” Gosselin; Rush Oxylimbaugh; Glenn Crazy Eyes Beck; and the list goes on.
Here’s how it will work. For the next couple of weeks, we will recount some of the dooshes catalogued in our year-long category aptly titled “Doosh Watch 2009.” We will then pit the dooshes against each other in the Thunderdome. And you, dear squeeperson, will vote for your least favorite doosh, or-if you prefer a phrase more semantically accurate-the dooshiest doosh as between the dooshes.
Put on your protective goggles, squeeples. You do NOT want to look any of these dooshes in the eye.
So here’s what you do: Assess the dooshery based on our prior blog posts throughout the year and any independent knowledge you may have of a particular doosh’s dooshiness. And then vote! It’s as easy as saying… something that’s easy to say.
We will provide a doosh dossier on each of three Doosh of the Year Nominees throughout the day. Then at the end of the day (8 p.m. PST-ish) that day, we will open the polls for voting. You vote for the dooshiest of the three. And at the end of the doosh round robin, we will pit our final three nominees against each other and award a Giant Bag of Doosh to our Douche of 2009. Stay classy, squeeple!
Next up are Serena Williams, Delonte West and Terrelle Pryor or as we at Thundersquee! like to call them, the doosh athletes who shouldn’t be allowed to talk.
Terrelle Pryor
Okay, some people will say you should cut this guy some slack because he’s young. But I say if you’re old enough to serve our country in a friggin’ war, you should be old enough to put together a few coherent thoughts. And no, saying “everyone kills people” is not a coherent thought.
To be fair though, that quote doesn’t quite do his dooshiness justice. First of all, he was defending Mike Vick. That was mistake No. 1. Mistake No. 2 follows in its entirety:
“Not everybody’s the perfect person in the world. I mean everyone kills people, murders people, steals from you, steals from me, whatever.”
Also, here is a video of him doing what he does best: Inserting his foot into his mouth.
We are left speechless from this ridiculousness, when HE is the one who shouldn’t be talking. And this makes us angry.
views: 196Thundersquee’s 2009 Doosh Thunderdome!
Delonte West: Doosh Dossier 
This year has visited a groundswell of doosh upon the hapless heads of Hags and Squeeple alike. A torrential outpouring of vinegar so vast in scope and relentless in attack that it can relate to only this: the countless acts of dooshery, douchestacity, and douchebagelry with which we, in the People’s Republic of Thundersquee!, have been forced to reckon. It ain’t pretty people. We’ve had Kanye Interruptus; Carrie Preach-jean; Jon “Ed Hardy” Gosselin; Rush Oxylimbaugh; Glenn Crazy Eyes Beck; and the list goes on.
Here’s how it will work. For the next couple of weeks, we will recount some of the dooshes catalogued in our year-long category aptly titled “Doosh Watch 2009.” We will then pit the dooshes against each other in the Thunderdome. And you, dear squeeperson, will vote for your least favorite doosh, or-if you prefer a phrase more semantically accurate-the dooshiest doosh as between the dooshes.
Put on your protective goggles, squeeples. You do NOT want to look any of these dooshes in the eye.
So here’s what you do: Assess the dooshery based on our prior blog posts throughout the year and any independent knowledge you may have of a particular doosh’s dooshiness. And then vote! It’s as easy as saying… something that’s easy to say.
We will provide a doosh dossier on each of three Doosh of the Year Nominees throughout the day. Then at the end of the day (8 p.m. PST-ish) that day, we will open the polls for voting. You vote for the dooshiest of the three. And at the end of the doosh round robin, we will pit our final three nominees against each other and award a Giant Bag of Doosh to our Douche of 2009. Stay classy, squeeple!
Next up are Serena Williams, Delonte West and Terrelle Pryor or as we at Thundersquee! like to call them, the doosh athletes who shouldn’t be allowed to talk.
Delonte West
For those of you who don’t follow the NBA with any sort of regularity, let me just tell you: This man is kind of psychotic (though in a good way).
Oh sure, he’s a mercurial player at the point guard position, and a true difference-maker for a Cleveland team that was simply Lebron and the seven dwarfs before he arrived. But can he really get his sh** together and help Cleveland win a championship? That we’re not so sure about.
The reason for this are manyfold, though most of them have something to do with him being a complete nutbar.
views: 147Thundersquee’s 2009 Doosh Thunderdome!
Serena Williams: Doosh Dossier 
This year has visited a groundswell of doosh upon the hapless heads of Hags and Squeeple alike. A torrential outpouring of vinegar so vast in scope and relentless in attack that it can relate to only this: the countless acts of dooshery, douchestacity, and douchebagelry with which we, in the People’s Republic of Thundersquee!, have been forced to reckon. It ain’t pretty people. We’ve had Kanye Interruptus; Carrie Preach-jean; Jon “Ed Hardy” Gosselin; Rush Oxylimbaugh; Glenn Crazy Eyes Beck; and the list goes on.
Here’s how it will work. For the next couple of weeks, we will recount some of the dooshes catalogued in our year-long category aptly titled “Doosh Watch 2009.” We will then pit the dooshes against each other in the Thunderdome. And you, dear squeeperson, will vote for your least favorite doosh, or-if you prefer a phrase more semantically accurate-the dooshiest doosh as between the dooshes.
Put on your protective goggles, squeeples. You do NOT want to look any of these dooshes in the eye.
So here’s what you do: Assess the dooshery based on our prior blog posts throughout the year and any independent knowledge you may have of a particular doosh’s dooshiness. And then vote! It’s as easy as saying… something that’s easy to say.
We will provide a doosh dossier on each of three Doosh of the Year Nominees throughout the day. Then at the end of the day (8 p.m. PST-ish) that day, we will open the polls for voting. You vote for the dooshiest of the three. And at the end of the doosh round robin, we will pit our final three nominees against each other and award a Giant Bag of Doosh to our Douche of 2009. Stay classy, squeeple!
Next up are Serena Williams, Delonte West and Terrelle Pryor or as we at Thundersquee! like to call them, the doosh athletes who shouldn’t be allowed to talk.
Serena Williams
Finding words to decribe her epic rant on a female line judge – a rant that ultimately cost her a U.S. Open championship — isn’t exactly easy. Especially after our own stopthemadness did such a great job of summing up earlier this year (Serena Williams will kill you). So perhaps video will tell the tale best:
Among the jewels she blessed the world with, perhaps the most damning of all was the initial threat itself: “If I could, I would take this fucking ball and shove it down your fucking throat.”
That’s the kind of thing we might say to someone if they’re threatening our family or raping our sister. The calm-headed Williams used it during a tennis match.
Charming.
views: 173Rush Limbaugh, Megan Fox, or Sarah Palin?
Doosh Thunderdome: It’s votin’ time.
So, whaddya reckon?
Thundersquee’s 2009 Doosh Thunderdome!
Megan Fox: Doosh Dossier 
This year has visited a groundswell of doosh upon the hapless heads of Hags and Squeeple alike. A torrential outpouring of vinegar so vast in scope and relentless in attack that it can relate to only this: the countless acts of dooshery, douchestacity, and douchebagelry with which we, in the People’s Republic of Thundersquee!, have been forced to reckon. It ain’t pretty people. We’ve had Kanye Interruptus; Carrie Preach-jean; Jon “Ed Hardy” Gosselin; Rush Oxylimbaugh; Glenn Crazy Eyes Beck; and the list goes on.
Here’s how it will work. For the next couple of weeks, we will recount some of the dooshes catalogued in our year-long category aptly titled “Doosh Watch 2009.” We will then pit the dooshes against each other in the Thunderdome. And you, dear squeeperson, will vote for your least favorite doosh, or-if you prefer a phrase more semantically accurate-the dooshiest doosh as between the dooshes.
Put on your protective goggles, squeeples. You do NOT want to look any of these dooshes in the eye.
So here’s what you do: Assess the dooshery based on our prior blog posts throughout the year and any independent knowledge you may have of a particular doosh’s dooshiness. And then vote! It’s as easy as saying… something that’s easy to say.
We will provide a doosh dossier on each of three Doosh of the Year Nominees throughout the day. Then at the end of the day (8 p.m. PST-ish) that day, we will open the polls for voting. You vote for the dooshiest of the three. And at the end of the doosh round robin, we will pit our final three nominees against each other and award a Giant Bag of Doosh to our Douche of 2009. Stay classy, squeeple!
First up are Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, and Megan Fox or as we at Thundersquee! like to call them, the Pig, the Lipstick, and the Pig in Lipstick.
Megan Fox
How dooshy is Megan Fox? So dooshy that our own KeeblerKahn has been grappling with her for months. But she kept fighting back. She floats like a butterfly, stings like a doosh. Frustrated, Keebler even declared A Day Without Megan Fox, earlier this summer. Megan Fox was unmoved; even that didn’t stop her.
Later that summer, we thought maybe she would undermine us by dressing real classy-like. Maybe she’ll de-dooshify. We all crossed our fingers.
We were, of course, fucking idiots. in spec-doosh-ular fashion, she turned down the opportunity to star with Daniel Craig in a Bond movie.
Then she stupidly informed us she might be schizo (doing a great disservice to those who actually ARE schizo).
And then she railed against Michael Bay, the one dude who saw through the doosh and helped make her a star (even if, as Lily the Pink noted, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen was a bowl of stupid.)
Finally in a spectacular nuclear holocaust of doosh, she went and did an interview with Rolling Stone during which her cup of doosh ranneth over.
Keebler wants her to STFU.
Stopthemadness wants to punch her in the vagina. (Oh and there’s the faux appearance anxiety and the “ZOMG!, am I ugly?” bullshit.)
Lisa(#1), after pointing out her diarrhea of the mouth earlier this year, adds these doosh points:
views: 220Thundersquee’s 2009 Doosh Thunderdome!
SARAH PALIN: Doosh Dossier
This year has visited a groundswell of doosh upon the hapless heads of Hags and Squeeple alike. A torrential outpouring of vinegar so vast in scope and relentless in attack that it can relate to only this: the countless acts of dooshery, douchestacity, and douchebagelry with which we, in the People’s Republic of Thundersquee!, have been forced to reckon. It ain’t pretty people. We’ve had Kanye Interruptus; Carrie Preach-jean; Jon “Ed Hardy” Gosselin; Rush Oxylimbaugh; Glenn Crazy Eyes Beck; and the list goes on.
Here’s how it will work. For the next couple of weeks, we will recount some of the dooshes catalogued in our year-long category aptly titled “Doosh Watch 2009.” We will then pit the dooshes against each other in the Thunderdome. And you, dear squeeperson, will vote for your least favorite doosh, or-if you prefer a phrase more semantically accurate-the dooshiest doosh as between the dooshes.
Put on your protective goggles, squeeples. You do NOT want to look any of these dooshes in the eye.
So here’s what you do: Assess the dooshery based on our prior blog posts throughout the year and any independent knowledge you may have of a particular doosh’s dooshiness. And then vote! It’s as easy as saying… something that’s easy to say.
We will provide a doosh dossier on each of three Doosh of the Year Nominees throughout the day. Then at the end of the day (8 p.m. PST-ish) that day, we will open the polls for voting. You vote for the dooshiest of the three. And at the end of the doosh round robin, we will pit our final three nominees against each other and award a Giant Bag of Doosh to our Douche of 2009. Stay classy, squeeple!
First up are Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, and Megan Fox or as we at Thundersquee! like to call them, the Pig, the Lipstick, and the Pig in Lipstick.
Sarah Palin
(1)she believes in death panels–you betcha!;
(2) she doesn’t care about Asian people;
(3) she needs The Shat (Bill Shatner) to interpret her nonsense;
(4) she quit her job;
(5) she gets burned in effigy;
(6) her daughter’s baby daddy doesn’t like her;
(7) she has dumb supporters;
(8) she even pisses off Fox News!
And Lisa(#1) specifically, raises these doosh points:
views: 200Thundersquee’s 2009 Doosh Thunderdome!
RUSH LIMBAUGH: Doosh Dossier 
This year has visited a groundswell of doosh upon the hapless heads of Hags and Squeeple alike. A torrential outpouring of vinegar so vast in scope and relentless in attack that it can relate to only this: the countless acts of dooshery, douchestacity, and douchebagelry with which we, in the People’s Republic of Thundersquee!, have been forced to reckon. It ain’t pretty people. We’ve had Kanye Interruptus; Carrie Preach-jean; Jon “Ed Hardy” Gosselin; Rush Oxylimbaugh; Glenn Crazy Eyes Beck; and the list goes on.
Here’s how it will work. For the next couple of weeks, we will recount some of the dooshes catalogued in our year-long category aptly titled “Doosh Watch 2009.” We will then pit the dooshes against each other in the Thunderdome. And you, dear squeeperson, will vote for your least favorite doosh, or-if you prefer a phrase more semantically accurate-the dooshiest doosh as between the dooshes.
Put on your protective goggles, squeeples. You do NOT want to look any of these dooshes in the eye.
So here’s what you do: Assess the dooshery based on our prior blog posts throughout the year and any independent knowledge you may have of a particular doosh’s dooshiness. And then vote! It’s as easy as saying… something that’s easy to say.
We will provide a doosh dossier on each of three Doosh of the Year Nominees throughout the day. Then at the end of the day (8 p.m. PST-ish) that day, we will open the polls for voting. You vote for the dooshiest of the three. And at the end of the doosh round robin, we will pit our final three nominees against each other and award a Giant Bag of Doosh to our Douche of 2009. Stay classy, squeeple!
First up are Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, and Megan Fox or as we at Thundersquee! like to call them, the Pig, the Lipstick, and the Pig in Lipstick.
Rush Limbaugh
(1) he’s oh so easy to dislike;
(2) he rules RNC Chairman Michael Steele with a pudgy oxy-filled fist;
(3) he thinks Mexico tried to infect us with pig AIDS;
(4) he makes assholic statements about Sonia Sotomayor and her heritage;
(5) he makes dickish comments about Henry Louis Gates, Jr. being a black militant;
(6) he inspires WTF!?-ism with his musings on Tiger Woods;
(7) he thinks people who exercise are fucking up the health care system;
(8) he blames Obama for Mark Sanford’s affair;
(9) he blames Obama for Michael Jackson’s death;
(10) he is a racist fuckwit;
How dooshy do you think Limbaugh is? Ponder the case we’ve made throughout the year, and add your own musings in the comments section.
(Stay tuned throughout the day as we make our case for Sarah Palin and Megan Fox.)
Put on your protective doosh gear, squeeple.
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