Depends on what your definition of “is” is.

As you know, Lady Gaga recently met the Queen (God save her) who remained, as far as we know, unmolested.  What you may not know is that a butt-load of other performers, most with questionable outfits if not acts, also met said geriatric. According to the Daily Mail, which, uh-huh is too a reputable news source (OK, I choked on that), Cyrus had the most daring outfit of the evening.  Because she was mostly nekkid.  Now, maybe I am just jaded with respect to shorts, but let us compare:

Gaga did a latex Elizabethan number - taking the revered symbol of the Brit monarchy and beginning of Queen rule, bondaging it up and performing in her Queen-Loves-Latex outfit before the current Queen.  I’d say that is pretty daring.  Gaga also played on a piano inspired by Dali (elephant legs from the Temptation of Saint Anthony) on a seat suspended from the rafters.  Also pretty daring.

Miley Cyrus, on the other hand, wore leather hot pants, gesticulated at her crotch and had back-up dancers who looked dangerously thin, if not dangerously old.  She also met the Queen in an orange prom dress that left her tiny tatters on display.  That is daring, I guess?  As in daring the Queen to backhand your sassy mouth, young lady, so go wash that paint off of your face!

Arguably, Cyrus was more “daring” in teh secksie sense, but TMIMO Gaga had “daring” in the bag in the thought-provoking sense.  The English language, isn’t it fun!

Anyhow, pictures of the non-Gagas after the jump.

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Suck it, backwater NY hicks

The Original

Best Video EVER!

How do you make a Lady Gaga video rock ballz? Add Eric Cartman and Christoper Walken, that’s how.

This has to win some sort of award.  They are just giving out Nobel Peace Prizes, someone get this on the short list for next year.

Toby Jones Rides Again!

A few months ago, Our own Lisa(#1) brought you Toby Jones’ Good Ass BBQ and Foot Massage advertisement.  Well Toby Jones has done it again.  This time it’s Jones’ Cheapass Legal and Prepaid Daycare Academy.  They’ve got top notch molester free day care services!  Who can argue with that?

Thundersquee! loves Toby Jones.  No diggity.  No doubt.

(Thanks to Reverend Random for the tip!)

More like, Crackbook.

Up until that last few months I’ve just logged onto the Faceybook (NO BACKSPACE!) to say “hi,” and see what my friends and family were up to. If you know me, like some of the Hags have recently learned, you know I’m not all that savvy on the computer. But I noticed all kinds of invites and hugs and the poking. Why do fools keep poking you? What is all this extra stuff? I normally ignored it and just read the news feed.

I recently made the mistake of accepting invites to Farmville and Cafe World. My life is ruined. Now my medulla oblongata is inundated with finding neighbors and cash crops. I haven’t been able to go to sleep without making sure I don’t plant any crops that will need to be harvested while I’m asleep. I also need to strategize that I will have enough food for the cafe and I’m ashamed to say I’ve been using a few cheats. What have I become? And, do you want to be my neighbor? Just askin.

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Some crap you may or may not know about this day

What, can't a guy just walk in the woods with a mask and axe?

Today is the day where everyone jokes about Camp Crystal Lake. Don’t even deny it; when you’re alone on this day you know you listen for “Kill, Kill, Kill, Now, Now, Now.” You know he’s not there… this time. Some people are so freaked out by this day they have their own phobia. So if you are afraid to even look out your door today then you may have paraskevidekatriaphobia. Say that shit 5 times fast.

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This brings the LOLZ…

…even with the inclusion of Perez Hilton.  (Hey, we can’t get everything we want, right?)

I double dog dare you to watch this and not automatically join me in the gutter.

It’s not just for women. They also have the Shake Weight for men. Because everything is better when you add Ellen, check out this clip from her show where she proves she is a better host than Oprah. You will want to pay particular attention to the 1:12 mark. You might also want to check out this clip where Ellen gives Shake Weight to Queen Latifah. Enjoy.

Where are they now?

What’s happened to those internet darlings since their 15 minutes went bye bye? Do you lay awake at night wondering what’s become of Chris “Leave Britney Alone” Crocker who seems to have evaporated into dust? Glittery dust at that, and we’d expect nothing less. Dry your tears because she’s still alive and making magic in the art form of  YouTube videos.  Enjoy as you hear Chris impart her words of wisdom and gives us a peek into her exciting life. You’re welcome.

To date Chris, has been downloaded over 4 times and if you want to wear a t-shirt proclaiming you like to eat your cornhole, then you need look no further. And remember giiiirl, it’s a hair flip.

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Or Don’t. They don’t care.

There are some salesmen out there that are so slick, they could sell ice to Eskimos. Then there’s Robert Lee. He doesn’t give a crap if Eskimos want to buy his ice. As a matter of fact, if he thinks the Eskimo in question is stupid, he’ll send him packing and refuse to sell him any ice at all. That’s just how Robert Lee rolls. I have a feeling Robert and Red Forman would get along just peachy.

You can watch the behind the scenes video here. I highly recommend it. And you can visit the Cullman Liquidation Center website here. I have to admit I kinda want one of there shirts.

This made me “awwwwwwwwww” in a big way.

This little girl proudly gave a report on her father who is fighting in Iraq… or so she thought…

What? No I’m not crying. It’s raining on my face.

(Thanks to justinsloe for the very masculine tip!)

Countdown to Awesome in 3…2…1…

There are some great Christopher Walken impressions out there. Kevin Spacey does a good one. Kevin Pollack does a pretty dead on impression of him, but no one really captures the essence Christopher Walken like, well,  Christopher Walken.

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The I reaaaaally hope this is in fact a joke edition

In case you are unable to read this, here’s what it says. (more…)

And speaking in tongues

Occasionally a product comes along that you know is destined for greatness. This, dear squeers, is one of those products. It’s not often we stamp our giant Thundersquee! Squeel! of approval on something. We are some picky bitches, but try as we might, we can see no downside–except maybe that it has a portmanteau for a name, but if we can forgive Lewis Carroll, we can forgive this product.  After all, what has Carroll done for us lately? So without further ado, we introduce to you the Sqweel Oral Sex Simulator (batteries are even included). I wonder if we can get a Thundersquee! branded version…

Hilarity For Sale

First up:

What the crap is going on at U of M?

Angell Hall Bathroom Shitter - w4w

Dear Mystery Shitter:

I know. I know. It’s downright the worst bathroom on campus. The Michigan Daily even said so in an article once. It’s usually a swamp of blood, piss, shit, vomit, and several mystery substances. It’s got some interesting graffiti, but that’s about the only perk. I very rarely use it, as there’s a much nicer one down the hall. In fact, I shouldn’t even be using it at all– I graduated this spring. However, the internet is out at home, and I’ve been spending lots of time in the Fishbowl as a result. Sure, I could walk down to the nice bathroom, but the Hellhole (that is what I will call it from now on) is closer. Sue me for not wanting to walk for fifteen more seconds. I’m a massive lazy-ass. (Although I always take the stairs, even to the fifth floor in Dennison, so perhaps I’m entitled to a break.)

Regardless. With it being summer semester and all, the bathrooms are usually much cleaner. Even in the Hellhole, the majority of stalls are usable.

Not today. (more…)

How do these things get invented?

I found a very disturbing picture that I thought I should share with the rest of the class. It seems that somebody was sitting at their desk one morning and decided that something was missing from their lives. As they sat looking at the hot brown liquid it occurred to them…I wish my mug was shaped like a toilet! Somebody actually thought their coffee would be more enjoyable if it looked like shit in a toilet. I work in the plumbing industry. Perhaps somebody might think it would be funny for me to have such a thing. Please for the love of god never buy me a toilet coffee mug because if you do I will be forced to throw it at you. I can’t imagine why anyone would want such a horrible thing. What would be your nightmare coffee mug?

Milk and Metal Does a Body Good

Lest we be TOO serious.

You know what are always funny?  Farts.

The Camo Edition

My hilariously snarky neighbor, who recently started a job in Cajun Country, sent this around last night, with the admonition that he fully expected us to all fight over the sheer awesomeness of this chair:

Real Tree Camo and leather newly upholstered one of a kind chair. This is not “camp furniture”, it is a heavy and solid piece of furniture. Would be a perfect accent piece to any Den, Study or Man Cave! It is a low back, wide arm chair with a reversible cushion that can go all camo or in it’s sleek latte colored leather side, for a not so “wilderness” look. If you have any questions or would like more pictures or information on it please feel free to contact me.

Of course this had to be immediately circulated amongst the hags for feedback.  Here are some of the highlights:

Stopthemadness: “That chair would be perfect for huntin’ in the bayou!”

Lily the Pink: “What chair?  I can’t see a chair!”

Mae: “That is the classiest and finest piece of craftsmanship this side of a pull-n-pork sofa.”

Moments later, Mae again: “I can already picture that chair in the back of a ‘92 F-150 hunting nutria.”